T-Day

Our little family has a tradition of eating out for Thanksgiving and then going out of town for the weekend. Last year we added the Tallahassee Turkey Trot to our routine. This seemed completely harmless because we had a 5 and 7 year old, so participating in the 1-mile Fun Run pretty much meant a stroll in the park. The kids upped the ante this year though. Ains actually made me run the Fun Run, and Hawthorne pulled Carter into the 5K. I'm a little worried about next year. Considering how horrible a runner I am, I should probably start training right now!

We had a great Turkey Day: Turkey Trot, Gumbo's turkey trot, lunch at Chez Pierre (my first vegetarian t-day), and goofing off around the house. We canceled our travel plans to put a dent in the work we need to do to move our bathroom reno along. (Oh, the bathroom reno. I forgot to tell you about that. Next time.) But today we'll play tennis and then head up to Thomasville, Georgia, to enjoy fried seafood and shopping for the perfect coffee table for our bedroom. It's actually more fun than it sounds because it's a cute little town with lots of interesting shops, a book store for Carter, a blingy store for Ains, and railroad tracks for Hawthorne.

Here are a few pics from the Turkey Trot. Notice the short sleeves! It's too damn hot for November.

Me and Ains lining up with the 1,055 1-milers.
More than 5,000 people participated in all the races.

We came in 421st and 422nd out of 1055. Not bad considering how far back in the pack we started.

We always look like giants when the kids take our picture.

I missed taking pictures of them warming up, so I made them do it again. Aren't they cute.

Carter and Hawthorne came in 1575th and 1576th out of 2,859. Not bad for HF's first 5K.
He said he's going to start training in May for next year.

The finish line. See Carter and HF?
The 5K winner was from University of Florida. He finished in 14 minutes. Wow!

Birds

On the way to school each morning we pass one of our favorite neighborhood lakes. It's a fun lake because it's full of turtles, has several families of Canadian Geese, and has a huge green field next to it that's perfect for playing ball (or was until Hawthorne started hitting so hard). In the spring we like to go there to feed all the fuzzy, chirpy baby geese, and the neighborhood association shoots fireworks off there on July 4, but the fall really is the most fun because that's when all the birds come. I stopped today to take pictures for y'all. They aren't the prettiest pics because the lake is low (no summer hurricanes) and it's seriously foggy today, but they'll give you the general idea of how cool the birds are.

They all look similar, but there are storks, great egrets, and at least one great blue heron mixed in there.
Around the curve to the left there were a bunch of Canadian geese and several different types of ducks.
The white birds were so impressive that I forgot to take a picture of all the others.

If you look carefully, you can see a flock of Canadian Geese flying overhead.
I wish I could add sound effects because they were really loud!
They're in the first picture too but are even harder to see because of the trees.

This hawk was circling the gray sky just above all the other birds. He was the cool loner.

The whole village thing.

When I was "deciding" to quit my job (quotes because I really had already decided, I just needed a little backup info to make it look like it wasn't an insane decision), I talked with a couple at-home moms about financial issues because giving up all that money was (insert your best Dracula voice here) very scary. I got the same thing from all of them: you clean your own house, you save money on clothes and dry cleaning and gas and lunches out and after school childcare, and you just figure it out as you go. I'm now spending more time with these women, and here's what I've discovered. They're either in denial or they're big fat liars. You want to know how they make it work? Money from their families. They get free trips, free furniture, gift certificates for their kids' school wardrobes, great hand-me-downs, and free babysitting. One of my friends even got a free car. Well, not totally free because the strings attached were two high-maintenance cats, but still. None of us do it alone. My sister-in-law just sent Ainsley a kick ass keyboard and some seriously cute skirts and my parents just brought me a packed-to-the-ceiling truck load of stuff. And when they brought the truckload, they stayed and took care of my kids and cooked and built new gates and stocked the kitchen and bought Halloween costume and party supplies and took me shopping! We can't do it alone. And it's not just a financial thing. Where would we be without our family and friends and all the volunteers that make our kids' schools work?

I'm a worrier. It's genetic, and it's worse without medication (which I recently stopped taking, why oh why). On top of that, emotions flow out of me like the Columbia River. Powerful and fast. I laugh a lot and cry a lot, and when I'm pissed, oh my god, stay out of the way. So when I get myself worked up about something, it takes some serious intervention to change the current. But here's what I know. I have a safety net. I know who to call if there's a medical emergency in the middle of the night and who would be there for me if something happened to Carter or if (how can I even type this) something happened to both me and Carter. But here's what I need: the friend to hang with. Because the ones who talked about how great it is to be an at-home mom are all going back to work. Damn it. So I must start building my village, which just sounds a little daunting.  Actually, it sounds downright painful.

You know those women's mag articles that talk about how you need all these different types of friends because no one person can be all that you need. You need the friend who can give you a kick in the ass when you need it, the one whose shoulder you can cry on... Mainly I need the one who is free for lunch, likes to shop, and can give good home decorating advice. Where does one find these people? Carter and I have joked about starting a church for non-church people, but seriously that's what I need. A place, like college and church and tennis leagues, where everyone already has at least one big thing in common. I'm guessing all these potential friends are going to be tied to the kids' school, but they aren't the obvious moms because those moms already have their friends: the other moms who spend all day helping at the school and then lead a girl scouts troop and participate in a zillion church activities in their free time. The moms I want are stealthy. I'm going to have to really seek them out. Yuck. But a village must be built because sexual favors will only get Carter into so many antique stores.

Sugar.

Here are the Halloween costumes and loot and an exhausted Gumbo (who spent hours guarding the house from all the creatures of the night). Ainsley was an ocean princess, but really all that meant to her was that she needed to have as much blue and green sparkly stuff on as possible. This is a really good thing because I suck at costumes, but I can so do glitter and jewels. Hawthorne was a baseball player—again. I couldn't even get him to wear his new baseball pants and belt. He insisted on the too-short and clay-stained baseball pants from last spring. I'm glad they were in the dark most of the time!

The kids had a blast walking the neighborhood with the Stults family and their friend, Erin, from next door. I stayed home and tried to hand out more candy than I ate, but Carter kind of set me up by buying caramel-filled Dove chocolates for the trick-or-treaters. How could I not eat those?! I was supposed to be detoxing after a beignet and lemon drop martini filled trip to New Orleans last weekend, but I just can't say no to chocolate. Actually, today's sugar hangover may go a long way to strengthening my resolve.

The New Orleans trip was our first non-kid weekend getaway ever. We were celebrating college friends' 40th birthday, and the invitation said no kids, so I was coerced. I thought I'd be super nervous, but I knew the kids were in good hands with my parents. I think what made it so easy for me was that the kids were in their element and we weren't getting on a plane. I always like the security of being the one behind the wheel. Never mind that I never know how to get where I'm going. That's why I have my handsome handy-dandy navigator riding shotgun or, in a pinch, a son who is obsessed with maps.

Even without the kids, our trip was very different than past New Orleans trips. Morning runs, no hangovers, more sophisticated food and drinks, happy hours spent exchanging family photos and stories. There's something to be said for getting older. We had such a blast, and it was so nice to spend time with old friends who knew us when we were just becoming "us." Maybe we should start planning our 40th birthday celebration. It really doesn't even seem painful that it's only 6 months away for Carter and 9 months for me. Wow! I think we should all meet at the beach!

Pass the veggies.

I was a little worried about how the kids would react to me becoming a vegetarian—especially Hawthorne who thinks that bacon is one of life's greatest pleasures. They've been great sports about it though. Of course, Hawthorne still gets to eat bacon, but we usually have vegetarian dinners that are a little more creative than our meals used to be. Tonight we had eggplant sandwiches. They were super yummy. The kids gobbled them up and went back for more. Ainsley took a picture of Carter's sandwich because he had the most left when it dawned on me to take a picture for our blog.

Here's the recipe in case you want to try it too.
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Eggplant Sandwich

1/2 cup all-purpose flour
2 large eggs, beaten
1 cup panko bread crumbs
1 medium eggplant cut into eight 1/2-inch rounds
1/2 cup canola oil, split
Kosher salt
lettuce
2 medium tomatoes sliced
4 ounces goat cheese crumbled or sliced
vinaigrette dressing

Place the flour, eggs, and bread crumbs in separate shallow bowls. Dip the eggplant slices in the flour, then the eggs, then the breadcrumbs, pressing gently to help them stick.

Heat 1/4 cup of oil over medium-high heat. Cook half the eggplant until golden brown and crisp, 2-3 minutes per side. Transfer to paper towel-lined plate. Wipe out the skillet and repeat with the remaining oil and eggplant. Sprinkle hot eggplant with 1/2 teaspoon salt.

Layer the eggplant, lettuce, tomatoes, goat cheese, and dressing to form sandwiches with the eggplant as the bread. Enjoy!
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The kids also really liked the eggplant dipped in ketchup, of course. Anything fried and dipped in ketchup is seriously good stuff.

You know what's not good stuff? All the dead and dying animals that Lucy keeps bringing in the house. We were home all day Saturday, so she brought us lots of presents. I think the final count was 1 snake, 2 moles, 4 lizards, 1 baby frog, and various yucky bugs. I appreciated having Carter and Hawthorne around to save me from having to round up and get rid of everything. I'll rise to the occasion when necessary, but I prefer it not being necessary.

Lucy's need for new stimulation is scaring me. Today she crossed the street. When Carter and I both went running out of the house after her, I think she realized what she had done wasn't a good idea. We got a little help from a very noisy scooter to reinforce the fear of the street lesson. Oh that cat! Here she is at the top of the trellis that is supposed to hide the neighbor's garage from sight. I think I'm going to have to get her a battery powered mouse to keep her entertained in the winter. Otherwise, who knows what she'll do in search of her next adrenaline rush!

wabi sabi

I have a new favorite magazine: whole living. It's a Martha Stewart publication, which made me skeptical at first, but they gave me a subscription rate I couldn't refuse. I'm sending it to all my favorite people for their birthdays. I would share with my Tallahassee friends, but I tear too many pages out! I received the September and October issues at the same time, and I've already torn out articles on mantras, easy meals to satisfy take out cravings, embracing imperfection (wabi sabi), and alternative ways to treat depression.  I'm also taking the advice of putting ferns in our bathrooms, reading dinneralovestory.com, buying recycled leather rugs, asking my family how I can love them better, and planting bulbs. In case you're wondering, Ainsley and Hawthorne both told me I could love them better by letting them eat candy. Hawthorne added that I could yell less. It doesn't take much imagination to guess Carter's answer! I went into my questioning with a plan to not be defensive at all. Everyone made it easy on me not to even feel defensive, but I did cave and remind Hawthorne that usually the reason I yell at him is because he doesn't respond to my calm requests. I asked how I should handle that differently. He didn't have a solution. I'll work on the yelling, but I'm not making any promises.

We did come up with a new plan for getting the kids to do their "chores." At the beginning of the week, we give them 20 poker chips worth $.25 each. Each time we have to remind them to do something they're supposed to do on their own, they have to put a chip in the Oops Jar. At the end of the week, they get to cash in their poker chips and start over. So far it seems like a pretty successful experiment. They aren't losing so many chips that they figure they can let it all hang out at the end of the week, and they seem proud of the of the ones they hold on to. Of course they don't actually have cash, just little IOUs in their banks because I never have any money either, but the IOUs seem good enough for them to get a kick out of it.

The weather here is hot again, but for the fleeting days of early fall, we tackled the yard. Living in Tallahassee is like living in the jungle. The rain makes everything grow (except the grass in the places you actually want it to grow). Vines pop up all over the place and take over entire azalea beds as if sprouting from magic beans. Huge elephant ears unfurl in every shady spot. And mushrooms of fairytale colors and size appear over night. Reigning it all in takes lots of time and muscle. Carter's new strategy is to flatten the dirt, put down plastic, and cover everything in pebbles. It really has worked miracles one flowerbed at a time. This weekend we started a new flowerbed that will become our butterfly garden. Gumbo trampled the old one, but we smartened up and are digging the new one outside his fence. We also removed wheelbarrows full of vines from our creek bed so that when the torrential rains come, they can actually get down the yard without washing out a foot of dirt (like they did last time).While Carter and I toil and sweat, the kids gather giant earthworms and create a breeze by flying on their trolley. I've attached pictures. It looks like fun, but I've tried it, and it's mainly just a scary ab and arm workout unless you're less than 5 feet tall and under 55 pounds.

Lucy also has been busy in the backyard. Killing critters. She brings in lots of worms, which I don't mind scooping up and dumping in the pot with the lemon tree. But she also brings in lots of gross bugs, which I have to call Carter to handle. Ick!!!! Today she brought us a giant mole. Really. My childhood cats used to bring me moles all the time. I'm used to cute little dead moles. But this mole was huge. Mouse sized. Why, Lucy? Why? I never felt very bad for the moles of my childhood because I knew my mom didn't like having them tear up the yard. Dead moles and people shooting at raccoons and armadillos is something you quickly get used to when you grow up in East Texas. But I so don't have a yard that can be hurt even by a giant mole, so I felt sorry for the furry little guy. I'm glad I'm so totally infatuated with Lucy because otherwise I'd be pretty pissed about the dead mole I had to fetch from under my kitchen table.

So I'll leave you with a mantra for the week: wabi sabi. It's fun to say, and it means, well for the most part, it means that there is beauty in imperfection.

Heebie jeebies

Lucy brought a snake in last night. Carter said he heard some commotion in the kitchen but just figured Lucy was playing with something. Uh, yeah, a SNAKE! I was the lucky one to discover the blood that led to a lifeless snake. I recruited Carter to get him out of the house though. He had disappeared this morning, so I'm hoping he slithered away rather than coming to his final death at the hands of another animal that we so perfectly laid him out for!

This morning, Lucy brought in another ribbon snake. A much smaller one that still had a lot of "fight" left in him. "Fight" is actually the wrong word because when under attack, these snakes try to slither away, but when that doesn't work, they just curl into a ball. Seems like a really bad strategy when dealing with a feisty cat! I explained to Lucy that there are a lot of cats that NEVER get to go outside. She seems appalled at the idea and shocked that I don't understand that her meowing by the door means, "Let me out so I can go catch some more cute docile little critters and bring their bloody bodies into the house!" Oh I get it missy, I'm just not falling for it!

These other crazy faces are an ocean princess and a living baseball. On Wednesdays we like to meet friends for kids' night at a local Mexican restaurant. Free kids meals, fun conversation, and creative face painting. The kids have Halloween on the brain, so they went with their Halloween costumes as inspiration for their faces. Hawthorne didn't really seem to get that he was a baseball, not a baseball player. I think he truly internalizes the concept of being one with the ball!

New addition to the family.

I really don't like Facebook. It feels like work to me, so blogging will have to be my way of keeping in touch. The downside, of course, is that for all of you who do use Facebook, I'm missing out on what you're up to, so keep in touch! I'll try to post regularly, and I'll keep the more personal, rambling stuff on Cornflower Blue.

For my first entry on our new family blog, I'll introduce you to the newest addition to our family. Lucy. She's a precious little kitty. She's tolerant of Gumbo chasing her into walls and poking her in the side with his nose. She lets Ainsley carry her around and close her up in her room where she can have her all to herself. She doesn't even get startled when Hawthorne is throwing make-shift baseballs (balled up sock, mushed up foil...) around the house and noisily diving for them. She cuddles with me and Carter while we watch TV in the evenings, and she actually sleeps at night. We thought everything about her was so very perfect until we discovered her "fault" last week. She likes to catch baby frogs and bring them in the house to play with. It's not pretty. Hawthorne and Carter have managed to save most of them, but a few have been dismembered and left to die. Ick! I'll be glad when the frogs go wherever they go for the winter.

Here's a picture of our little cutie. Stay tuned.